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First Person

On Competition

by Laura Yeager The same part-timer has won “Adjunct of the Year” two years in a row. He’s good, but you know you’re just as good as he is. He has the edge because he wears a clean, pressed shirt and a tie every day. He looks efficient,…

On Babies

by Oronte Churm Readers of my regular dispatches for McSweeney’s Internet Tendency email me to say, “Oronte, you’re so erudite, so urbane! Your prose sparkles like a gin bottle at the dump! How is it you’re still just an adjunct?” To them,…