The “Ad-Junct” Life–Working Toward Contentment
by Sunny Knable, Ph.D.
Ad– the prefix meaning “to or toward.” Junct – the root word meaning “to join, meet or link.” Adjunct — the precarious purgatory in which Ph.D.’s linger until they become full- time faculty, move to an undesired location, change careers or become a bitter version of themselves. After five years as an adjunct, I just might be moving toward the exit sign to join another path. The adjunct life is not for everyone.
Every semester could be the last. If a class is dropped, there might not be enough credits to qualify for health care. Over the winter and summer breaks you can plan all you want, but might be shuffled around at the last second. Observations from full-time faculty might not see the part-time context. Try not to check pay stubs. It’s better if you think of it as a nonprofit venture. It will pay off someday, though… right?
Complaints aside, Higher Education is still a nourishing profession that can provide resources, connect with the larger community and nurture a new generation of inquisitive minds. That is a noble cause and a satisfying place to call home. In fact, it’s so close to home that it’s in my blood, having been raised running down the hallways of a college. My father was a professor for 30 years in the Los Rios Community College district of California. Many of my earliest memories are of watching him teach music theory, appreciation, history, MIDI and ensembles. When a student performer didn’t show up for Thursday night jazz band, he would let me sit in, jumping from piano to bass to drums. It was the beginning of my Higher Education even though I could barely see over the music stand.
As an adult, I stumbled into academia for lack of something else to do, but by my sophomore year was transformed into a serious student. Though a composer and performer first, it was proven to me in my upbringing that university was a steady, rewarding place to hang your hat. So, three degrees and twelve years of college later, I was thrilled to be offered an adjunct position in the CUNY system. Here was my foot in the door — the same feet that carried me from hallways of my youth to the steps of adulthood. But that’s where the path becomes obscured. Just where do I go from here?
To answer that question, I turned to people who could offer a perspective on the balance of academic work and family life. A parent of one of my students said to me, “Now at the end of my career, I am less enthusiastic about academia. I say that from a place of having achieved a full-time tenure-track position in my preferred city.”
I asked her about how she managed to have a family and a career in academia.
“The reason I’m such an old parent is that I waited until my third position. Even then, I felt that I had to wait until tenure to have a child. Of course, things are different for women than for men.” Hearing the struggle in my story, she offered the simple advice: “Nothing is more important than family.”
Is the world telling me to stop trying so hard to improve my position?
This reminded me of David Brooks’s recent book, The Second Mountain in which he describes a modern American culture that rewards career success above everything. In it, he posits that a life of “me, first” might never let you experience the true fulfillment that comes with the Second Mountain – a life lived for others. In relation to academia, one could argue that those mountains are one in the same. To live a life in academia, is to live with others in mind —students, staff and colleagues. However, to climb the academic ladder (to mix metaphors) can feel very self-centered. Is now the time to make a career move?
My wife and I signed up for Disney+ for the free year to watch the Pixar movie “Soul,” based on the life and career of a real-life musician (and Queens College graduate). Despite its great soundtrack, a fantastic cast of African-American characters, amazing animation and a wildly unique after-life story, I had trouble enjoying it. A lot of what makes it interesting to the general public is too close-to-life for me: the rat-race of New York City; the feeling that even when you’ve achieved success, it’s never good enough; the dreaming of a perfect gig that would fix all things; and the sad reality of career compromise. Of course, the message at the end is what we already knew from John Lennon’s proverb: “life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” “Soul” got me thinking: Am I asking the wrong questions?
Over the past 5 years, Freshmen became Seniors and then went off into the world. Even in the face of normal young-adult problems, they were held to a higher standard when they could do better and given slack when they needed it. As they walk across the graduation stage, I feel pride in having helped them to get there, even though they might grumble about the grades they’d received in my classes. Though I am not yet a father, I imagine that this is what it feels like. Tired, rundown and bleary-eyed, you do what you do because you have to. It’s in your blood.
It is in that moment when I see the Second Mountain. It is where my Soul meets my purpose. In that moment, I am no longer just an adjunct — or perhaps, I am at its root: to join, to meet and to link. When you are there for others, you are fulfilled. That is your answer. To the students, we teachers give to you what was handed to us. It is part of an unbroken chain that we pass down through generations. We do not know who began it, nor did Socrates, and we don’t dare drop it. It is heavy at times, but worth carrying. Though the path will not always be clear, it will always be yours. Up mountains and down ravines, you will learn to bear the load. We must always be mindful to enjoy the view.
